Last night I painted Katia’s nails turquoise, a color that I wore for more than 30 years! Yes, I guess you could say I was way ahead of my time! However, when I turned 50, and everyone else began to wear blue, green, and purple nail polish, I stopped wearing it. “Why be like everyone else?” I thought.
Today Katia (my soon to be 12 year-old niece/god-child) and I were on the beach. I was watching her as she danced on the sand between the waves. She was listening to her mp3, her long hair and her turquoise nails were flowing through the air; she reminded me so much of myself that I had to ask, “Where did the time go?”
Wasn’t it just yesterday she was a baby that I was holding in my arms? 
A small child who thought the moon liked her because it would wait outside her bedroom window, and would follow her wherever she’d go. This same little girl who not that long ago wrote a letter to the tooth fairy telling her that she put her tooth in a box (with an arrow pointing the way) in case the tooth fairy took a wrong turn and got lost.
As she laughed and danced and sang on the beach, I asked again, “Where did the time go?” Wasn’t it I who not that long ago was dancing on the beach in Southern California; a young girl not that much older than she is now? Wasn’t it just a few years later that I was dancing on the beaches of Greece and Spain? I could see myself wearing my turquoise nail polish, my hair blowing in the wind like hers?
A lifetime of memories kept passing before my eyes. Aware that Katia’s life is just beginning with all the potential and possibilities awaiting her, and I was happy and hopeful that her life will be as good as mine. 
But!…I was also aware that my life was mostly behind me now, and again I asked myself, “Where did the time go?”
A lifetime. How quickly it went. How quickly it passed. Like a dance, like a sigh; like a ship passing by. Thousands of moments that make up a lifetime and I sat there extremely happy and sad.
Maya Muses: I regret forgetting my digital camera today, but some of the best photographs are those that are only taken with our eyes and remain forever engraved in our minds.
Photo Credits: Personal Photos and Flickr
6 responses so far ↓
1 Mia // Jul 29, 2008 at 11:48 am
Time does fly by so quickly….
I; as you, remember it like yesterday….
As the song says:”those where the days my friend,we thought they never end,we sing and dance for ever and for more…..”
And it is kind of funny to see that it all comes back again….
I guess that is what life is like…new and old in a mix,depending on what age you are and where you are in your life experience…
That is why people in all ages and whatever they do in life fascinates me…
You never know what they have been through in the past….
And if you look behind the “masks/roles”we all play in life,if you are sensitive enough,you see and meet people “naked”….
I think this is what being innocent means…
Because children are still more in the here and now…They/we also can experience life with wonder in eyes and hearts….
I hope, even if times goes by,I never will forget to approach life, and people with wonder and a open heart….
Sad and happy..we still are dancing and singing are we not?Life is still amazing…
Wish I were there on the beach with you two “girls”….
I always take my pic’s with my eyes and carry them inside me forever….They truly are the best!
2 Lynn // Jul 31, 2008 at 7:37 pm
Yes, life is amazing, but why happy and sad you ask. Happy when I hope and imagine a wonderful life in front of Katia and all the possibilities that await her. Sad and a little nostalgic that the greater part of my life went by so quickly.
If I had to sum up my life in one sentence it would be, “One Big Party”! That’s mostly what my life has been and I realize how fortunate I am.
3 Mia // Aug 1, 2008 at 11:48 am
You certainly are!
My life in one sentence?”A Roller coaster ride!”
But it has been fun,interesting,magical,mysterious,everything… and it is NOT over yet!
Don’t talk as if your best part of life is behind you…
You have not seen nothing yet!
4 Lynn // Aug 1, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Actually I’m being very shallow when I mention sad. I think it has less to do with life and more to do with being sad that physically I’m no longer the young woman that use to turn heads in the streets and restaurants.
I see young guys look at Katia and I know as she gets older that will only increase. Katia will be twelve soon, yet most of the people in France think she looks about fourteen. I’m happy for her….but you have to admit when you’re use to men looking at you and then you reach a certain age and they look less and less, it’s not easy to adjust, but what can you do?!
As I wrote about Brigitte Bardot, you have to age gracefully instead of becoming a mummy like so many Hollywood actresses! But!!! I never said it would be easy!
5 Mia // Aug 2, 2008 at 11:31 am
Yeah…I know what you mean….
When we were out biking,some guys in a car that passed by,whistled after me….hehe, still makes me smile that men find me attractive enough to do that…
Silly maybe,but hey I am human!
What I do is I love myself as I am now…
I look in the mirror and say:” hello there, you are looking good,you are beautiful…It works!
Not always though,I have my bad days too….
Then I don’t go out!hehe…No just kidding…
Actually,yesterday I went out without “warpaint” to a restaurant with Ulf,his brother and 2 sons…Felt good doing that…
True,it is not easy….
6 Lynn // Aug 5, 2008 at 10:45 pm
It does work! We look as good as we feel, it’s feeling good about ourselves that’s sometimes the hard part…..especially as we get older!
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